Another year, Another lesson
Not only is December my birthday month, but it is also the busiest time of year for most people. Christmas is such a special time, but can be emotionally and financially stressful. You have a Christmas party one weekend, a school party the next week, squeezing in shopping, wrapping, planning menus, hosting guests, clearing out the old to bring in the new…we have ALL been there. I can honestly say that each year I learn from the last about how to handle the Holiday stress, and to not put so many things into one day. But really come December on my birthday I always reflect through the year, sometimes even go through all my Facebook photos and posts and think, WOW…WHAT AN AWESOME YEAR! I also know that reflection is key to…. well, the key to me, being me…but a new and improved me.
I know that God plays an intricate part in this, He always has. I really struggled with some things this year but I have learned that I am not in control. I also have/had people in my life that I feel for, because they seem to be stuck in this never-ending “I’m just not learning a thing” cycle. I know some people would judge me and think “why are you even bothering with this joker” Seriously? Well, here are some of the Lessons I have learned this year of how to break that cycle!!!
LESSON #1: LISTEN…You see I learn a lot from Church, from the message, from whatever God tells me throughout the day. I may forget little things at the store, but the lessons in life, are most important! I learned this year not to be a “Christian Snob” meaning really I am no different from someone who has a jaded past, drugs, prostitution or whatever it may be… or from someone who is currently struggling spiritually or financially. God wants us to embrace all, because you never know some of us are just one paycheck away from being on a street corner begging for money just to survive. So I understand some situations, you have to plant your seeds, and then move on. Not to be an enabler, but a LIGHT.
LESSON #2 LETTING GO…I have also learned, letting go is the biggest part of growth. Because when you let go and literally let God take over, amazing things do happen. It is always the case when you try to control a situation, do everything you can to make it work the way you “think” it’s supposed to work. But all that happens is a great big mess….it is usually because you are not taking the time to really think things through. You just start to react then it becomes like a time bomb ready to explode. Slow down and let answers come to you.
LESSON #3: RELATIONSHIPS Quality not quantity….hmm how can I sum this up? Social Media, is so huge to be caught up with the Number of “Friends” or “Followers” you have, or how much you communicate, post your ups, your downs, your successes, etc. I get that and do it all the time. From a business prospective, Social Media is detrimental to success. On a personal side, it can give some people anxiety and create animosity. Posts can be read out of context, can be offensive to others, and others just straight up ridiculous to even post their baggage. But it happens. The main thing to know that out of the friends I do have on Social media I really only communicate and socialize with a small percentage in real life. I am one of those that have a lot of friends but only a few I can share my deepest moments with and truly trust to be there for me. I know that it is important for me to relay important messages on Social Media that can help someone, and not offend others. But it doesn’t matter what the world sees on your pages, because only you know what is really going on. Only the ones who truly care for you will even understand you. Know that you don’t need 20 friends or even 5 to make you feel substantial. One really true friend is really all we need, whether that’s your spouse, or your true blue girlfriend. Don’t question why God hasn’t placed you within a large circle of friends or a popular social circle….He has a plan, and this has always been proven to me time and time again.
LESSON #4:NURTURING. This was huge for me! My husband and I both being triathletes got so caught up with our training this year as we both tackled the Olympic Distance Triathlon. Ok, I don’t even like to brag about this because I admire all those Ironmen and Women out there! But with a busy family and both spouses training and working, it was a little crazy this season. Starting up Light Endurance, my oldest son getting married…all took place this year…but all good! As the training took over our schedules, there was some head butting going on. My husband had his own training plan, and me and my girlfriends had our own. Because he is not a stickler for staying with a plan, it kind of blew up in his face. He won’t always admit to that, but as a wife, it’s important to let your husband be a man. As the season was reaching the height of it all, he started getting edgy and then it became a competition of time. Who is going to swim in the morning, who is going to bike this weekend, who is going to Spin, who is going to run??? Who comes first?? We realized that our only date nights for the season were dropping the kids off, and then going to bed because we had a race the next day. We weren’t nurturing our relationship. Triathlon was becoming first. I always refer to the scripture, “Where your heart lies, there your treasure will be also” I know what my husband’s weaknesses are, and whether right or wrong, you have to be willing to be the one to step it up and for sake of the relationship….just suck it up and sacrifice. So I did! I gave up more than half of my classes, and changed my training to mostly during the day while the kids are in school and around my schedule with only one night of training away from my family. Did this change his way of training? HA! well no…he still overslept, he still got lazy. But at least there was more time for him and I, and in the long run, I know next season my sacrifices will pay off for the both of us and our family.
So summing up my year of emotional heart-break, letting go, letting God, nurturing, embracing social media and understanding rejection but embracing quality friendships…..it’s all worth sacrificing. Though be-it, small adjustments can make copious leaps. Make a list of what you think needs to change in your life and write down one small thing you can do to make it better. Don’t try to change your life in a months time, but always reflect on the year and see how much you have grown. Don’t ever try to make yourself better just to compete with someone else…but YOU CAN make yourself better to impact the life of someone else or the lives of thousands!